It is absolutely impossible to avoid rumors and judgement in a culture as intertwined and connected as the one that we live in today. This being said, rumors and hate are some of the hardest things to deal with when you are trying to “do you” (my favorite saying – meaning to follow your gut and do whatever truly makes you happy) and be proud of who you are.
Through my journey of figuring out life and who I am as a person, I’ve had to handle my fair share of rumors and negative comments made about myself – whether it be my personality, my appearance or what I post on social media.
First. Look at where the rumor came from. Someone always knows somebody, who told someone else, who told your best friend and then she told you. It may be a laundry list of names, but you can almost always trace a rumor back to its source. BUT, stop and think. If you have to trace back through a long line of people — are you even sure you care about what this person has to say about you? Do you even know them or is their opinion important to you?
Second. If you’ve determined that you couldn’t care less about the negative things the source (could be a stranger, a friend of a friend, even a current friend, etc.) has to say, then just drop it and move on with your life. However, if this rumor came from someone important in your life and you can’t seem to brush it off, then you might need to confront the issue. I use the term “confront” lightly – don’t go in guns blazing accusing this person of treason. Go about it respectfully, ask the person if they truly mean what they said and why they said it, and go from there.
Third. Live to see tomorrow. If at the end of the day – after you’ve thought out whether or not you should confront this person or if it’s going to have a real impact on your life – it really doesn’t bother you too much, then continue on with your life the way you have been. Keep doing whatever it is you were doing to attract the rumors and negative comments, and then don’t give a damn if someone ever says anything like it again. Nothing beneficial comes from stressing yourself out thinking about what other people think of you.
Am I pretty enough? Am I annoying? Do I talk too much? The answers to those kinds of questions do not matter to friends that genuinely love you, and those are the kind of friends you want to keep around. That right there was one of the first lessons I learned when I decided I wanted to make my personal growth a priority. People who say nasty things behind your back or lie to your face are NOT friends, no matter how long you may have had a relationship with them. If they aren’t fully in your corner, I promise that you will survive without them.
Empowering women to love themselves and who they are down to the core is something that I am passionate about. I love seeing women thrive and grow in their own skin as the person that they are meant to be, honestly just living their best lives. I hope that my blog can help, even just the slightest bit, by bringing positivity, good vibes and an optimistic “glass-half-full” perspective to anyone who reads it. Until next time – kept doing you and don’t listen to anyone who tells you otherwise! xo